Where's your faith, baby?

More blogging inspired by reading other blogs when I should be sleeping.

Hey, I took my cold medication, I'm just waiting for it to kick in.

So, more comments on the "theory" referred to here.

The part that annoyed me about the criticism of the theory, and yes, I realize that everyone is rallying around the blogger here (I like it when my friends to back me up, too)... the part that really annoyed me was that I could see myself saying something similar, from a place of sincerity, honesty, and with no guile or ill will.

I meet or have conversations with women.

Some of them attract me, some don't.
Some I want to be friends with, some I don't.
Some attraction will be sexual in nature.
Sometimes it will be exclusively sexual, sometimes it won't.

How does that differ from anyone's experiences?

Are some people so wrapped up in the concept of a gender war that they can't see the commonality?

I will grant you that there are players out there, dishonest people masquerading as decent when they're not. But you have to be pretty cynical to believe automatically that every member of the opposite sex (whichever sex you may be) is a liar simply out for their own interests.

What's even more annoying to me is that I believe this cynicism was applied to myself. Someone I dated was so cynical about men that any inadvertent misstep on my part was interpreted as meaning I was a wolf in sheep's clothing. It tore me up. Tore me up and still does.

Either have some faith, or quit dating. You're messing things up for us innocents.

A number

Age.

It divides us all.

Yesterday I playfully suggested a date with someone who is 22, but I hoped it would not be taken seriously, as I could only imagine the ick factor for her if that were the case.

Yes, there is Tom Cruise. Thankfully I am not Tom Cruise, for it seems horrifying to me to have this manufactured image hanging over me 24/7, paparazzi vultures circling. Not to say that he is good or bad. I'll never know him.

Yes, I've dated outside my societal norm, and it was fine overall.

Yes, I know a 35-year-old woman who slept with a 19-year-old. And I slept with her. And I do recall the "you're sleeping with everyone your partner ever slept with" line from whatever scare-of-the-week government program that was.

That last woman said to me, on our first date, "My friends tell me I don't look my age." My first thought was, yes, yes you do. :-) She had kept in good shape, to be sure, but as scrawny as she was after 3 kids, the eyes never lie.

Someone who dated me said to me, "My friends tell me that you (Vince) don't look as old as you are." If I've had enough sleep, and I'm a happy guy, I can see the young me in the mirror, but I have no illusions that I am really anything other than what I am.

Although I know that society devalues women who age, and men "only get more distinguished", I am eternally reminded of that creepy old guy who used to stand by the side of the dance floor watching all the fine young women. I don't want to be that guy.

Former others

I read your blog, and I felt like telling you I wanted to kick his ass for making you feel that way. I remember when I started out with D and you said you would do something similar if she hurt me.

I'll send a hug your way instead.

It's not us, you know, it's them.