The Search Begins Anew...(1/29/06)

Ok, so let's review.

There are women out there who are:
- Smart.
- Intelligent.
- Sexy.
- Fun to be with.
- Good-hearted.

But.

So far it seems that *life* itself is my greatest enemy. Which I kinda figured out before I even separated. It was one of my greatest fears, in fact, that there wouldn't be anyone out there to meet.

Ok, first of all, I wasn't exactly right.

There are women you can meet. That you'll like.

YOU JUST CAN'T KEEP THEM!!!!!

AAARRRRGH!!!!!!!!



A sad moment just now as I reduce my MSN Messenger list by one. And I'm not sure about whether to add "D" back in or not, for the chance at an occasional chat, or if this is one of those moments I should be ripping the band-aid off instead of pulling slowly. Knowing me, it makes no difference.

I've had a range of relationships ... in terms of time, depth, personality mesh, guardedness, connectedness...

Time doesn't matter. As long as there's enough time to get to know someone. All the time in the world with the wrong person doesn't make them right. I learned this in post-separation relationship #2.

Sex doesn't matter. You can have sex with someone, and it doesn't change the meaning of the relationship. Sex is a reflection of the state of the relationship.

Guardedness slows things town and prevents or damages connectedness, but it isn't an insurmountable obstacle.

Personality mesh and connectedness. That's what matters.

And if I get over a threshold of connectedness with someone, they stick with me in my head even when LIFE kills the relationship.

So to rip off the band-aid or not.... makes it no easier on me.